The Great Pumpkin Massacre

It seems I have become a pumpkin roll factory lately without any sign of it ending anytime soon. I went out on a limb and tried a recipe I found online and LOVED it. Don't be fooled, it's seriously NOT hard. I am no seasoned cook/baker/domestic diva and even I could make these!

It started a little over a month ago when in the midst of what was supposed to be a quick trip in Food City, I decided to buy 5 pumpkins. I hadn't grabbed a cart, thinking I could carry the few staples we always make sure to keep in the house that easily cover every meal... cereal and milk. So I picked up one of the pumpkins and decided to come back for the others on another trip.

Did you know that pumpkins don't come pre-washed and scrubbed clean?? Yeah, I knew they didn't either... that's why I took 5 minutes to choose the prettiest pumpkin ever and then scooped it up under one arm, putting all that nasty grimy dirty dirt next to my white sweater.

After the damage was done, I went back to get a cart, loaded up 4 more nasty grimy dirty but still very pretty pumpkins and finished the trip.

Skip ahead a couple weeks, I was craving Paula Dean's gooey pumpkin butter cake, found the pumpkin roll recipe, and was planning my last attempt at baking edible pumpkin seeds.

The pumpkin seeds were a bust (pictured outside on our deck where their little smoldering butts could quit stinking up our teeny tiny mansion). I totally burnt them within the first 3 minutes. Maybe they were still wet from washing before they marinated. Maybe it was the 10 lbs of melted butter I covered them in. WHO KNOWS? From now on, I will scoop the little devils out, wash and dry them, then pass'em on to someone else who knows what they're doing in that area. Every year I try, every year I fail. I'm done.

***What to do when the spilt food on the floor of the oven is causing a horrific scene of smoke combined with the burning pumpkin seeds, the fire alarm is going off and you can't see through the billowing gray clouds in your apartment and the resulting tears when smoke gets in your eyes??? GOGGLES! And if you don't have goggles, find the biggest, goofiest, ugliest sunglasses you have and where them instead; for your protection and the entertainment of others.***

BUT I did successfully bake a pumpkin roll on my first time! AND I MADE IT WITH REAL PUMPKIN THAT I COOKED DOWN MYSELF!!!!!!!!! (This is actually an even bigger surprise, but again, the internet taught me how to do it in the microwave which works wonderfully.) The only thing I changed since the first one I baked, and this is very important, was to DOUBLE the icing recipe. Trust me on this one. I also sprayed Pam cooking spray on my jelly roll pan, laid down wax paper and sprayed that too. This makes it MUCH easier to flip that baby out after it's cool down.

My little cousin Sydney loves pumpkin roll and spent the night with us again last night just so I would make her another one. She did help, a little.

My final word on the topic though... go ahead and use the canned pumpkin. It's so not worth the fuss. I know many people say that the real pumpkin makes everything taste so much better, (Mom), and maybe it does. But my taste buds are not discerning enough to justify the fuss of chopping, gutting, cleaning, microwaving, scooping, freezing, and thawing just to use the real stuff. I'll be passing on my stock of frozen pumpkin guts to my mother who appreciates the difference: